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Poldark Inspired Beach Shoot
Cornish beach wedding
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Bridal Makeup Inspiration Shoot
Why you should go Bespoke
Guest post written by me for Pasties and Petticoats about why YOU (yes, you!) should buy a bespoke wedding dress
Most people don’t even consider having a bespoke wedding dress made. I completely understand. My sister got married before I set up my business and it never even crossed her mind to have a bespoke dress. This was partly because she doesn’t consider herself particularly creative or arty, and didn’t think she would want to be involved in the process. We also assumed it would be much more expensive to have something made when, in fact, many of the dresses she tried on cost more than some of mine do.
I am convinced that everyone should have a dress uniquely designed for them at least once in their life. It is such a special process and when better to treat yourself than in the lead up to the most precious day of your life.
Choice
Boutiques often have hundreds of dresses, but all in very similar styles. When my sister went wedding dress shopping a few years ago, everything was strapless, and after five or six dresses they all started to seem like the same dress. She was very clear about wanting dress with an empire line and straps or sleeves (her only two criteria) but because that wasn’t the ‘in’ style, the shop assistants just kept bringing out more and more strapless corseted dresses and insisting she would love them. Spoiler: she didn’t!
One wedding photographer recently said to me you don’t have many sample dresses, but they are each so different that it’s hard to narrow them down. And, of course, since every dress is individually designed, brides are free to mix and match details from my dresses or bring their own ideas to the table. If you want to stand out and get something memorable, or even just find something flattering to your unique shape, having something handmade is the best option.
Fit
This might seem like an obvious one, but since most of us have never had anything tailored to fit us we can’t appreciate how much of a difference having something fitting us properly will make. Not only will it be much, much more flattering, but it will be much more comfortable. How any times have you had an item of clothing that you love, but it gapes a tiny bit at the front, or pinches under the arms, or just sat ever so slightly wrong on you? This is your wedding day – you don’t have to settle for less than perfect. A well made dress will not need as much corseting or heavy fabric as a store bought dress, so you will be much more able to move, eat, dance, and get carried over the threshold at the end of the night.
Budget
As I mentioned before, bespoke dresses have a reputation for being prohibitively expensive but this absolutely does not have to be the case. Since you are having a dress specifically designed and made for you, it can be designed within a certain budget. You can pick styles and fabrics to make something that is affordable for you rather than being stuck with the flat rate prices of dresses in shops. You will know that every penny is being spent on making something perfect for you, rather than the closest approximation you could find to what you actually wanted. What’s more, when you buy an off-the-rack dress the price you pay does not include alterations, so you typically have to add another 10% to the price in order to have the dress fit you properly. With a bespoke service this is of course included, so once you have agreed on a price you know that there will be no hidden costs.
The personal touch
Supporting local designers is immensely rewarding as there is a personal element to the process that is absent when buying an off-the- rack dress. A huge part of the fun of having your dress made for you is the relationship you develop with your dressmaker. There is something really special about meeting someone and knowing that they are the only person who is going to be involved in the designing, pattern cutting and making of your wedding dress. I fall in love with every dress I make and have been lucky enough to develop close friendships with many of my brides.
The experience
This really ties together all the previous points, but I really believe that other than getting the perfect wedding dress, a big part of the fun of going bespoke is being able to enjoy the whole process. From the initial consultation where you get to be personally involved in picking the fabric, lace, cut and design of your wedding dress, to seeing it grow and being updated at every stage, it’s so much more magical than waiting for your dress to arrive in from China.
Beginner’s guide to Bridal Fabrics
As you go through the process of buying a wedding dress one of the most important factors that will define the look, feel and cost of your dress is the fabric that goes into making it.
There are two main defining characteristics that go into bridal fabric- fibre (what it's made from) and weave (how it's structured). Not all fabrics are woven, some are knitted, like the jersey fabric in t-shirts, or 'non-woven' like the fabric in your makeup wipes. It is very rare to find these in bridal wear so I won't be focusing on them here.
Fibres are loosely grouped into organic or inorganic, meaning their source is either natural or man-made. Natural fibres, like cotton and silk, tend to be softer to touch, drape more gently and more breathable to wear. They're generally the better option, but they are often more than twice the cost of man made fibres like polyester or viscose.
The second factor that has a big influence on the appearance of the fabric is the weave structure. Slightly more technical, this simply refers to the way the warp threads (that run along the length of the fabric) relate to the weft threads (that run from side to side). So in a standard weave, weft fabrics go over one, under one, over one, under one etc along the whole fabric, giving a nice smooth fabric.
Some useful ones to know:
- "Satin" refers to a weave structure in which one set of threads goes over 4 or 5 of the other direction before going under one and repeating. This results in long 'floats' which make the fabric shiny and smooth. You can have satin made from polyester or from silk, and the difference can be really noticeable.
- "Chiffon" is very fine, translucent fabric that I use quite a lot in my work. The silk version drapes beautifully and feels magically soft, and I would absolutely recommend it for the bride, but bridesmaids can sometimes get away with using polyester.
- "Tulle" is used to mean anything like net. Pure silk tulle is generally unpopular because although it has a beautiful drape, it's denser than it's synthetic counterparts and less good at adding volume to the dress.
Hopefully these basics will help you navigate the world of wedding dress shopping and given you some insight into the bridal industry! I'll be writing a follow up blog on the three most commonly used types of lace and I'll also be explaining why I prefer to only use organic fabrics.
Sizing in Wedding Dresses
Or "Are you sure this is a size 12"
It seems like it's fairly common knowledge that wedding dresses "run small" compared to high street shops. I want to quickly explain where this impression comes from, why my samples are the size they are, and some quick ideas on how to keep your sanity while being manhandled into a very tight dress by a sales assistant on what is supposed to be a happy day.
First of all- it's important to remember that sizes are just numbers. They help the industry codify bodies, which come in all shapes and sizes and heights and proportions, into roughly 6 standard sizes. The system is imperfect, not least because it appeals to the side of our brain that wants to put things in boxes and say "okay so if I'm a size X I must look like Y", or worse "I can only be happy if I'm a size X" This brings about what is often referred to as "vanity sizing", where high street shops make their sizes fit a slightly bigger body in order to make them feel good and therefore buy the product. Of course, once one shop does this there's a lot of pressure on their competitors to do the same- why buy size 14 jeans from here when you fitted into the 12s next door. The lower end of the fashion market, the fast fashion we wear most days, is more guilty of this than higher end fashion. Similarly, within the wedding industry the high street dresses like Monsoon bridal or Phase 8 run truer to their casual fashion equivalents, while the bigger designers often work to vintage patterns, before the gradual growth of vanity sizing.
I think small sample sizes are one of the areas the wedding industry really let's itself down. Quite often very normal sized women will say to me that they haven't been able to try on a single dress that does up. When I first started my collection I made all my dresses a size 12 or 14 sample, and over the last few months I've had to slowly tailor them down to size 8s so often for models there is no longer any point in me making samples in any other size. The issue has been that I underestimated the role styled shoots (like the one on Pasties and Petticoats or b.loved) would play in advertising my business. These are generally organised by the photographer, who will usually give me a choice of size 6 or 8 models. One of the main reasons the corseted look is so in fashion right now is that it's one of the easiest styles to adjust the sizing of, by lacing it tighter, saving the designers a lot of time doing fittings on models and then ultimately brides.
How to keep your sanity while being manhandled into a very tight dress by a sales assistant
- Ignore the sizing. If possible, don't even look at the number in the back of the dress. If the sales assistant says the number out loud, pretend it is American or European sizing and that it means nothing to you. It bares so little resemblance to the sizing you're used to that this shouldn't be hard. Focus on the dress not the size.
- Be kind. Don't say anything about yourself, your body, or the way you look in a dress that you wouldn't say to your friend if she was trying wedding dresses on. I stole this trick from Amy Poehler and I think it's brilliant. Don't say the word fat. Don't point out your bingo wings. Focus on the positives, but be honest about what's not working. I use this in every area of my life.
- Go bespoke, so you never have to assign a number to your size! Obviously my favourite tip is to have something tailored to you so that it's never a "size 12", it's a size YOU. You are not a number. You are beautiful.
Beginner’s Guide to Wedding Photography
Getting the photography right on your big day is so important. Not only do you want to remember the way you and everyone you looked on your wedding day in the years and decades to come, but brides and grooms are often so busy on their special day that going through the photos is a great way to share some of the moments you might have missed. It's a large part of your budget- typically about 10%, and unlike the dress, the cake and the venue, it's very difficult to try it out before the big day. This is one area where I would really recommend stretching your budget as far as possible- having worked with a lot of wedding photographers recently I can attest that you can really tell the difference, both on the day and in the pictures, between the two ends of the pricing spectrum.
While you generally can't try them out I would definitely recommend going through a lot of their work, including a few whole weddings, so that you have an idea of what your wedding gallery might like.
THREE BASIC STYLES
CLASSIC
Quick description- Classic or traditional wedding photographers are the sort who will take photos more or less how your parent's wedding album looks. Formal, posed group shots and a good selection of posed couple portraits. Generally the cheapest option, often wedding photographers start out shooting traditionally before finding their signature style.
Perfect for- Brides who have a set list of photos they want taken. If you're a pinterest addict and you like posing for and setting up pictures this might be the perfect style for you. Classic photographers will take as many group shots as you like, which is bound to keep your granny happy.
How to spot them- Often the best way is to ask friends and family. If you're less worried about the photographer's individual style, this can be a really quick and easy way of finding them. If you're on their website, look out for pictures of groups of people all looking at the camera, or the bride holding the bouquet above her head triumphantly.
JOURNALISTIC
Quick Description- Candid, journalistic or reportage wedding photographers aim to be as noninvasive as possible throughout the day. They will take group pictures if you ask, but in general will just follow your day from behind the camera taking pictures whenever they see them.
Perfect for- Brides who don't like to have their pictures taken and don't want to spend time away from their guests on the day. My sister used a brilliant photographer who took her for a 15 minute walk on the beach, and we barely saw him for the rest of the day, even though he was taking stunningly intimate pictures of us.
How to spot them- look for buzz words on their website like natural and relaxed. Their gallery should be full of people laughing, showing real emotion and looking super natural.
EDITORIAL
Quick Description- These are the photographers with really unusual visions for your day. Because they are often so diverse, it is difficult to lump them all in together- my personal favorites are fine art wedding photographers like Rachel Rose. They take more time than other photographers, but they bring their unique vision to your day and create beautiful images. Be prepared to have to get ready at least an hour before you leave for church to take posed pictures of you and your maids, and to take an hour out after the ceremony for pics with you and your husband.
Perfect for- brides who are willing to spend more time finding a photographer who's style suits them. Brides who feel relatively comfortable in front of a camera.
How to spot them- these photographers often promote their work through styled shoots on wedding blogs and in wedding magazines. Try your local wedding magazine or links from your dress designer or florist's photography and social media. Once you're on their website, keep an eye out for pictures where the light is incredible- it's often the best sign of a great editorial photographer.
The Small Wedding Guest-List Hack
One of the biggest influences on how much money your wedding is going to cost you is how many people you're inviting. The average number of guests attending weddings is falling- in the US it fell by 10 last year to 140. But the average amount we spend per guest is still on the rise- up to £180 from £145 in 2009. Every couple on that list is costing you another £360. The cost of a big guest list is more than just the huge catering bill; more guests mean paying for a bigger venue, more decorations, more crockery, more table linens, more stationery, the list goes on. Often, people are invited more out of obligation than a genuine desire to see them on your big day. So I've come up with a cheat to help narrow down the guest list to only the people who really love you and really deserve to be there;
WOULD YOU LEND THIS PERSON £100.
It's going to cost you more than that to have them at your wedding, so if your answer isn't a resounding yes, leave them off the list.
